Letters to Spiritual Aspirants

by Clara M. Codd

Part 2 [back to part 1]

Preface

Nothing in all the world matters so much as the growth in each one of us of a spiritual outlook upon life. Dr. Annie Besant has defined spirituality as "the intuitive perception of Unity." It is the perception of the trust in the utter surrender to Life which is the Shadow of God on earth, and the glad acceptance of all the changing, never ceasing events of that Life which are God in action. For, always and ever, Life means only our eternal good. Underneath are the Everlasting Arms. And spirituality is born of little things done "in His Name and for the love of man."

These little chapters have been extracted and put together from letters written to a large group of correspondents all over the world. They were letters, written at regular intervals to some of our members who desire to lead what is called the spiritual life, and, in any case, a life of dedication to our Masters and Their great work. It was believed that what has been written to a few might prove helpful also to others who may care to read them. Hence this book.

Clara M. Codd

Note: Abbreviations used throughout: "H.P.B." For Madame Helena Petrovna Blavatsky

CHAPTER -IX-

ON BEING A CHANNEL

We would each like to be a "channel" of the Master's force, if we could. There are two things I would like to make plain about that. When anyone is the accepted pupil of a Great One - in a way so subtle that it is almost impossible to describe clearly - the pupil's consciousness is included within the Master's greater one. Slowly, very slowly sometimes (because the Master never force the pace and has a very tender regard for what His pupil can sustain) the rapport between the two steadily increases. Of course, the pupil's little consciousness can never wholly understand or reply to the Master's so much greater and purer one.

The Master K.H. Uses the simile of two tanks, one empty and the other full, with a feed-pipe between. How long it takes, said He, for the knowledge and power of the Adept to flow into the Chela depends upon the size of the feed-pipe; that is to say, upon the power of the pupil to assimilate and respond to the beauty which now surrounds him. The exchange, He says, is scientifically regulated by the Master. But it means that while the pupil is in touch with inexhaustible strength and beauty, he (the pupil), being a separate evolution and individual, also imparts something to the Master's consciousness, too! Whenever the Master has time to look in the direction of His pupil, all that pupil's thoughts, desires and actions will arise in the Master's consciousness, and also all that has happened around him to a much more minute and spacious degree than the pupil himself can realize.

But we must not think, when we talk of the pupil's being a "channel" of the Master's power, that he just stays put, an automaton, waiting for power to be poured through him, like an empty pipe. That is not at all the idea. I remember Dr. Besant's explaining it to us. She said that the Master cannot put through his pupil anything that the pupil has not himself first initiated. The pupil himself must first be radiating peace, or sympathy or encouragement, to others; that will give the Master the opportunity, if He so wills, of enormously increasing the pupil's own radiation. He can heighten and increase it to a great degree, but He cannot do anything unless the pupil has already started radiating helpful thoughts, emotions and actions.

The Master used His disciples, who are very different often in temperament and capacity, for that which they excel in, not for what they lack. For example, the Master will use one disciple who is a tower of strong character, to encourage and strengthen work and workers all around him. The workers will feel how much they can do while he is with them. Another disciple, whose great characteristic is a deep and loving sympathy with others, the Master will use to bless, encourage and soothe many a weary and bewildered heart. He uses us for what we have and are, not for those things which as yet we do not wholly possess.

We would like to be, each of us, a channel of the Master's power; and through Him, of the Divine Power and Blessing. That is possible, even before a man is the officially recognized pupil of a Master. Any man can make it possible for the Master to use him by his own steady attitude of mind and heart, and by his complete surrender to the Divine Will as shown through the Master. The saints knew this; especially the most wonderful of all saints, little Therese of Lisieux. Let us take her as an example. It is the secret of being what a Medieval mystic meant when he exclaimed: "Oh! that I might be to the Almighty what a man's hand is to a man."

As time went on, St. Therese became aware that she was growing in her contact with novices (for she was made at twenty the Assistant Novice Mistress); that a heavenly wisdom flashed into her heart, and sometimes a most amazing insight into the thoughts and motives of her charges. When first she was appointed to her post she thought the task beyond her strength. But she took refuge in God. She says that "the knowledge that it was impossible to do anything of myself greatly simplified my task." Her impersonality was astounding. No personal predilection ever moved her on what she felt was God's will.

Pope Benedict XV called her "she who has become the mouthpiece of God.' Even when her lot was misunderstanding, hurtful words (and she had many of them), she took it all as from the hand of God. Her first Superior was very severe with her, and she answered: "I thank you Mother, for hot having spared me. Jesus knew that His flower was too weak to take root without the life-giving waters of humiliation." When one of the novices said extremely rude things to her, she was filled with joy, and quotes in her autobiography the words of King David: "Yea, it is the Lord Who hath bidden him to say all these things."

If we can see Divinity coming in every little happening in Life, even sad and unpleasant ones, it will not be long before Divinity begins to speak through us. But we must make a complete surrender, not a partial one, keeping perhaps one little thing back. And the surrender must be for always, not only for as long as it suits us.

We have no power just in ourselves to do much, yet when God and the Master are with us, we have all the power in the world to aid and to bless. The price we pay for that accomplishment is the glad and simple acceptance of all that comes. Two of the six Jewels of the Mind, which are the Third Qualification for Initiation, are "Uparati and Titiksha." Generally translated: "Tolerance" and "Endurance" (the Master K.H. Calls this last, "Cheerfulness'). But we could translate them thus; Uparati, "letting people be what they are," and Titiksha, "letting events be what they are." A person must be what he is, just as a flower stands at a certain stage of unfoldment. We might like to reform that person, whereas the only persons each can reform is himself. We would evade events, but he who is strong and unselfish enough to welcome all events gains a heavenly wisdom.

CHAPTER -X-

THE NATURE OF CHARITY

Much old wisdom is wrapped up in derivations, so let us look at the origin of the word, "charity". Webster's dictionary says the word is derived from two Latin words; caritas, dearest, love, and carus, dear, loved. It is clear that the spirit of charity does not mean giving to the needy - often that which we do not want, ourselves. It really means "to whom all things are dear." If all persons and all things were dear to us, what patience we would have, what willingness to learn to understand, what desire for the highest good of all. Sometimes I feel that there is only one lesson to learn in life down through the ages: how to love. We all think we know that art, but I very much doubt it. What passes for love is often only self-love, projected. Love has to be learned; and it takes many a life of sorrow, loss, and disappointment to learn it.

Sometimes people will be honest enough to admit that apparently they do not love anything. Being human, they must have the power to love; but, like many of us, they are too negative. They do not love but wait to be loved; so their own active, forth-going power remains atrophied for lack of use. Like a man who has stayed too long in bed, the power of action must be slowly brought back to full use once more.

St. Francis prayed that he might seek to love, not to be loved; to understand, not to be understood; to console, not to be consoled. St. Paul wrote: "Charity suffereth long and is kind; charity envieth not, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things."

A Tibetan Scripture describes seven forms of love, three of which belong to men, and four to the gods. The first and simplest of these forms is also shared by atoms and molecules and planets and suns. It is mere magnetic attraction and soon exhausts itself. The second we can call psychic. It is on a fifty-fifty basis: I will love you if you will love me; you owe me something because I love you. This carries the seeds of its own death. The love which is immortal and can never die is hardly natural to man and must be learned: it is so to love that we desire only our friends' highest good and in his own terms. Who is willing to love so well? How often instead we try to force people into the groove we have marked out for them.

Sometimes we lose a loved one by death or estrangement. Then comes our chance to purify and enlarge our power of loving. "Death and estrangement," says Light On The Path, "show a man at last that to work for self is to work for disappointment." When we can hardly bear to go on living because death has taken our loved ones, what makes us suffer most? Are we thinking of their great gain? - or are we mostly conscious of the loss to ourselves of their dear and attentive presence?

One thing we must always remember: a man can never lose that which he loves if he continues to love it! A work will return, a lover will return, if in his heart he continues to love and serve. That is the deathless power of the Universe because it is the fundamental aspect of God. Dr. Besant had a friend who, after having helped her in a great work, suddenly turned for a while against her and tried to destroy the results of their effort. Dr. Besant still kept his photograph on her desk, and when an impulsive member asked her why, she replied: "Do you not know, my dear, that if you continue to love, in spite of everything, you win the right to help that person in another incarnation? A devoted wife asked the Lord Buddha how she might be sure that she would meet her beloved husband again in all future lives. The Blessed One told her that if she never ceased to love, and forgave him everything, she would forge bonds that could never be broken.

St. Therese of Lisieux meditated on the injunction of the Christ to His disciples to "love one another' as He had loved them. She found that "true charity consists in bearing all my neighbours' defects, in not being surprised at mistakes but in being edified by the smallest virtues." She knew, too, that she should show herself honoured by the request for service and if anything was taken away, she should appear glad to let it go. This, she said, was true of heavenly as well as earthly things.

If we love, we rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that do weep. In His great meditations for His monks, the Lord Buddha taught them to love so that they longed for the happiness and welfare of all beings, and to be so compassionate that the sorrows and disappointments of others moved their hearts profoundly and their joys filled them with joy, also. Such is Love which saves the world.

CHAPTER -XI-

DUTIES, ANXIETIES AND REMORSE

So often people get confused as to what is their duty. Sometimes they ask me to tell them. Of course, the ultimate decision must come from within. Do not be afraid to make a decision even if it should turn out in the long run to be a mistaken one. We shall never evolve our powers of judgment unless we boldly decide, and are bravely willing to learn from the results. If we ask other people to decide for us, the power of judgment will never grow.

Is a member, called home to the aid of ailing parents, giving up the Master's work for personal service? What a terribly short-sighted, inhuman point of view! What is the Master's work? It is not merely addressing envelopes in a Lodge Room, or even giving fine addresses to the public. It is all kind, helpful, unselfish work for others, especially those to whom we owe a debt of gratitude. "Ingratitude," wrote a Master, "is not one of our vices." And He said: "He who breaks one single human tie to come to us cannot be our disciple."

The love, the understanding, the inspiration of human beings is our work, far, far more important than the mere mechanical business of carrying on the organized side of the work, valuable and important as that is.

A Master's advice is given thus: "Because you try to take up higher work, you must not forget your ordinary duties, for until they are done you are not free for other service. You should undertake no new worldly duties; but those which you have already taken upon you, you must perfectly fulfil - all clear and reasonable duties which you yourself recognise, that is, not imaginary duties which others try to impose upon you. If you are to be His, you must do ordinary work better than others, not worse; because you must do that also for His sake."

When decisions must be made, we may, of course, consult with those whom we deem wiser than ourselves, but do not follow blindly or shunt decisions onto their shoulders. Mrs. Besant once told us that when anyone came to her for advice she said, 'if he had been strong enough to take any other, he would never have asked me."

Should anxiety or remorse follow a decision, be philosophic about it. We would not be upset if we were merely observing the same mistaken doing in another. Then why, when we see it in ourselves? How calm and compassionate we can be about the mistakes of others! What wisdom we would learn if we could be strong enough and pure-hearted enough to be willing to learn from the results, whether they brought us bliss or pain. We learn by our mistakes. Perhaps there is no other way by which we can learn. Always it is the personal loss which hurts. H.P.B. Said that vanity and remorse were both rooted in the personal life and could be cured by the realization of the One Life. Even a too morbid criticism of personal motives is unwise. A Master has written: "Cultivate happiness, knowing that depression and over-morbid investigation of motive and undue sensitiveness and over-morbid investigation of motive and undue sensitiveness to the criticism of others leads to a condition wherein a disciple is almost useless."

An old Indian scripture says: "Regret nothing. Never be sorry. But cut all doubts with the sword of knowledge."

CHAPTER -XII-

SELF-SATISFACTION

Self-satisfaction is so natural and so common a feeling that we can hardly avoid it - even if, discreetly, we try not to show it. Do not let us be ashamed to own that we have this weakness, but let us try to understand it. We all like to be appreciated; we all like to feel that we have succeeded, that other people think well of us, and perhaps look up to us. You know why? It is because we all, from the spiritual standpoint, are yet children, not quite grown up. And like all little children, we seek security and reassurance. Self -respect and self-trust are necessary for happy and useful living.

Why, then, does the spiritual life demand of us that we seek no self-satisfaction? Because in that life we are seeking to die to our little selves in order that a Greater One may live in us. It would be cruel and unwise to seek to destroy this self-satisfaction in one who has not yet reached the point were he has glimpses that he must do this for himself, not in others. As the Lord Shri Krishna said in the Bhagavad Gita: "Let no wise man unsettle the minds of ignorant people attached to action: but acting in harmony with Me, let him render all action attractive."

It is natural, it is right, that in the ordinary man, self-interest and self-satisfaction should rule. H.P.B. Told us that this personal motive formed, as the ages passed, a protective carapace round the as-yet-immature and undeveloped Diviner Self. It is like the shell which encloses the unborn chick. And this operates and grows, all the time a man is upon the Pravritti or Outgoing Path of life. When, however, a person turns towards the Nivritti, or In-going Path, and seeks to find and become one with that Godhead which is at once the Source and the Goal of his being, his motives gradually change. Slowly he breaks the shell of his own ego-hood, and begins to live a life of continual radiation from Eternal Sources. He finally becomes, in H.P.B.'s words, "an imperishable centre without a periphery.' The personal motive is replaced by the universal and impersonal motive. His little self has "died", that the Eternal may shine forth through him.

Hence, in all action the Yogi tries to act as for duty, not for personal aims. "Thy business is with the action only, never with its fruits." Shri Krishna described how, being above all action, He yet mingled in it everywhere. "For it I mingle not ever in action unwearied, these worlds would fall into ruin.' The business of the universe must be done for God and not for self. And a man's past, his karma, as well as his inborn evolutionary trend, his dharma, determines where his work lies.

This elimination of the "profit" motive cannot be brought about at once. It takes many years, sometimes lives, to achieve it perfectly. Yet there is a way, a lovely way to do this. It is the way of offering through love. Sometimes a true lover knows his way, for he cannot help doing all for his beloved, and finding it joy. As the Imitation of Christ says: "Love rendereth all burdens light."

This means that all that happens to us we take as from His hand; all that is given to us we offer to Him; all that we do, we realize is nothing without His aid. "Without Him," wrote Krishnaji, "I could have done nothing." Said the Master to Krishnaji: "Hold back your mind from pride, for pride comes only from ignorance. The man who does not know thinks that he is great, that he has done this or that great thing; the wise man knows that only God is great, that all good work is done by God alone.

When happiness comes to us, let us go out in thought to all whom we love and share it with them. If sorrow comes to us, let us keep it to ourselves and share it with God, or with those who have a similar burden to bear. And when praise and appreciation come our way, let us check any feeling of exultation, and pass it all on to the Master. It belongs to Him. I remember Mr. Jinarajadasa's saying, long years ago, that whenever people came to him with praise and thanks, he at once offered it all to the Master.

Who is he who can work just as loyally, just as unflaggingly, when he sees no results, receives no appreciation? Yet how lovely to be able to do so! There is only one reward for the spiritual man; to know that he is serving His Lord, and to give that Lord more and more. We can slowly transfer the little motive to the Divine one, by the habit of daily offering and dedication. As the Lord Shri Krishna said: "Whatsoever thou doest, whatsoever thou eatest, whatsoever thou offerest, whatsoever thou doest of austerity, do thou that as an offering to Me."

At first, this renunciation of personal reward makes life look a little grey, but that greyness is soon replaced by an unshakable peace. "He attaineth peace, into whom all desires flow as rivers flow into the ocean, which is filled with water, but remaineth unmoved - not he who desireth desires." That, indeed, Annie Besant once told us, is the Royal Road in occultism, if there is any royal road. "I live, yet not I, but Christ in me," wrote St. Paul.

But let us make this self-surrender not for duty's sake but for love's sake. "Happiness is a great love, and much serving."

CHAPTER -XIII-

CRITICISM

Most of us are rather critical, some of us very much so. The tendency of the world is all in that direction, so it is not surprising that it affects us, also. The world is supercritical for two reasons. One is that man is still developing the lower, concrete mind, the faculty that flourishes on perceiving differences. That lower mind loves to compare, to set one thing against another in comparison. And in doing this - the second reason becomes apparent - it wishes to compare to the detriment of others and to the aggrandisement of itself. This is because mankind is not yet very spiritually evolved; man acquires a certain sense of security and pleasure from feeling that in some way he is superior.

Mrs. Besant told us that we should be trying to evolve the higher mind which thrives on seeing likenesses: the "intuitional" mind, it is sometimes called - the mind which can discern great underlying principles and to whom surface differences seem not so much to matter. It will help us to think over the Greek root of the word "criticism." It comes from the word krinein, which means 'to appraise," "to judge." In old English to judge was sometimes rendered "to deem." And to this day the chief judge in the Isle of Man is called the "Deemster." That deeming does not necessarily connote blame. Yet in the vast majority of cases, criticism does so indicate. Continual meditation upon the One Life will enable us to see that there is no sin in the Universe, the lack of growth. Thereafter we can criticize without praise or blame.

Is not the habit of blaming a very prevalent one? Why? Because men wish to feel secure in superiority, to uphold their own insecure egos. It is natural, and easily to be understood, in the ordinary man. That is why it helps to praise generously and to appreciate. It is a little cruel to withhold such need from the average man. But surely none of us need to aid our own sense of well-being by looking down on our fellow-men! The habit of criticism in a blameworthy sense is so common in this world that it has become an everyday trick of speech. The Master K.H. Calls public opinion "the most flippant and cruel of all tribunals." Without knowing it, many of us have acquired a similar habit. It really comes from a bad inferiority complex. If this habit gains too great hold on us, we shall destroy not only our sense of judgment but also our happiness. Let us remember the words of the poet, Wordsworth:

We live by admiration, hope and love, And even as these are well and wisely fixed, In dignity of being, we ascend.

We all desire to be loved, but we must love. We all desire to be appreciated, but we must appreciate. Without hope, life would have lost its savour; therefore, do not let us destroy hope in the breast of another; appreciate instead. So many of us have such a negative frame of mind. Many people tell me that they have no friends, that no one loves them. But that is because they wait to be loved, sought out, and appreciated. Now, if we went out boldly to learn to love truly and to appreciate, we should soon find a glorious return. For the world more or less gives back to us what we give it.

Now, the habit of continual criticism prohibits any glorious return. Is there anything in the world so wonderful as a friend? Yet how many beautiful friendships are lost because we have too quickly criticized, too easily taken offence. I remember a woman's telling me that she had never married because she had never found anyone to come up to her ideals. I felt like saying: "My dear woman, why ever should anyone come up to your ideals? It is enough if they try to reach their own."

Let us kill the spirit of blame in our hearts, or we shall lay up for ourselves much sorrow in the future. Always to be setting people straight will cause karmic problems with them. This does not mean that we must be blind to faults and failings but to be charitable to them, and not to talk about them. Even when someone has really injured us, to forgive such a one is to make him a friend. It effects a reversal of polarization in his emotional nature.

Especially do not let us criticize, even to ourselves, someone to whom we owe a spiritual debt, someone who has helped us. For thereby we cut ourselves off from him - it may be forever! - unless we strive to regain by service and contrite love the lost ground. Mrs Besant used to talk to us about this. She quoted the saying that no man is a hero to his valet. This is not the hero's fault, she said, but because the soul of the valet cannot see aught but petty things. And she warned us that if we had once seen the light through anyone, to hold fast to that, and not to fix our eyes upon other things, or we should lose our vision of heaven.

There is a very old manuscript. No one knows who wrote it. It is called Your Friend. Here are its words:

Remember that friendship is a privilege, not a right. Beware of saying to your friend, "where do you go and for how long? With whom and to what purpose? Beware of advising him as to the length of his apartment, or the adornment of his person. Seek not to encage the winged one within the confines of your judgement. Know the values that are his breath, and the freedom that is his orbit. Or you shall find in your heart but the long silence, and the bright plumage of a memory. But he, the splendid, will have flown.

CHAPTER -XIV-

THE PROBLEM OF OSCILLATIONS AND REACTION

So many of our people do not rightly understand the problem of oscillations and reactions. All things move under the rule of unceasing rhythm. There can be no "action" without corresponding "reaction". The ceaseless rhythmic "up and down" of life is everywhere apparent. This is very marked among those who strive to live a spiritual life.

In the case of a great saint, the reaction is so terrible that it sometimes lasts for years: St. John of the Cross, a great authority on this subject, calls it the "dark night of the soul." This darkest night always precedes the gaining of the great path of Union with God. It may be looked upon as a tremendous purgation whereby the last lingering remnants of self in the aspirant are finally taken away. As I said, in the case of great saints, it sometimes lasts for years. It lasted five or six years with St. Catherine of Siena. St. Catherine had what are called "interior locutions," where the mystic seems to speak with God. When finally she came through she said to God: "Where wert Thou, Lord, in the midst of all this foulness?" And God replied: "Daughter, I was in thy heart."

What are the signs of these reactions? The saints tell us in very clear terms. That which before had attracted them in glowing colours of love and aspiration becomes dull and lifeless, even repulsive. St. Therese of Lisieux passed almost the whole of her short conventional life in such a dark night. She writes in her autobiography that there were times when she could neither pray nor meditate, that she read holy books but the words meant nothing to her. She was assailed by the most hideous doubts, almost as if some mocking voice were telling her that her faith and aspiration were selfish illusions on her part. She writes that if God wishes her to sit at the table of sinners she is more than willing to do so, and not even to wish to rise from it until He gives the sign. What strength and what selflessness belonged to the saints that they could endure this with such patience, and never ask or hope for "consolation." Therese said to a novice who had prayed for consolation; "Oh! that I would never do, ask for consolation. It is so sweet to serve the good God in the dark night of the trial."

Now, in the Theosophical Society, as in all forms of aspiration, dark nights continually occur. They come to all of us again and again in lesser or greater degree. With us the darkness generally takes the form of becoming what school boys call "fed up." Theosophical truth and books no longer attract us. Our ancient aspiration and realization seem to completely disappear. We may even think our leaders are self-deceived or talking nonsense. Most people do not understand it; so we find that under a particularly violent attack members leave the Society and its work, and try to ease the pain of reaction by condemning that which originally they adored. What a vast pity!

Bishop Leadbeater talked to us about "avitchi," the very worst form of dark night that exists in the universe. Avitchi means the "waveless," feeling oneself absolutely outside the scheme of evolution, entirely alone. Can you imagine anything more truly horrible? Yet he told us that we must all experience that someday in order to know how to help a man who may be living in it. And on the way, said he, there are minor avitchis which come and go.

Mrs. Besant told us that when such an oscillation reaches anyone of us, we should just hold on, and remember that though the clouds may seem to have completely engulfed us, behind them the sun is always shining; presently the clouds will break and the sun shine again upon us if only we have the selflessness and strength to endure. She said to me one day when I had a minor attack in Adyar, "It sounds brutal, dear, but remember that it does not matter what we feel."

Sometimes the darkness takes the form of over-scrupulousness, of being extremely dissatisfied with oneself. This is the reverse end of hidden conceit and pride. Why do we make up our minds about ourselves? Why not leave that to the wisdom and compassion of the Master? St. Therese said to her novices: "If you are willing to bear in peace the trial of not being pleased with yourself, you will be offering the Divine Master a home in your heart." There is a similar lovely saying in Hinduism: "They who never ask anything, but simply love, Thou in their heart abidest forever, for this is Thy very home."

The accepted pupils of a Master are tried by the Dark Powers, as God allowed Job to be tried by Satan. They must win the fight alone. The Master will sympathize, but He cannot fight the battle for the pupil. These experiences are tremendous "purgation's." "The shell must break before the bird can fly." And the Lord Shri Krishna says, "When I have stripped a man of everything, then I give him Myself."

CHAPTER -XV-

PURITY

I believe that the word "purity" is very much misunderstood. On the surface it often seems to mean some non-infraction of man-made moral law. But it means vastly more than that. Man-made moral law alters with passing centuries. It is moral in Moslem countries for a man to have more than one wife. In Thibet it is moral for a woman to have several husbands. I think purity means "wholeness," "completeness." A pure white handkerchief splotched with ink or other foreign matter is no longer "pure white." And what is true of a piece of white cloth is just as true of our minds and hearts. Love is pure when it has no other element but complete surrender and sacrifice, when all thought of self, either as gainer or giver, has one and only desire for the blessedness of the beloved remains the motivating force. First love is sometimes like this.

Our minds are pure when there is in them no thought beyond the will to mirror the divine, impersonal light. "If thine eye be single, they whole body shall be full of light." So singleness of mind, wholeness of heart, constitutes purity. But one thing can strain the eternal light - the thought of self, the little self. To appropriate things to ourselves, even divine things, is to touch the Holy with soiled hands. The stain is of the essence of desire, desire for self, not desire for God, or for all. Personal desire stains the white radiance of purity, even desire for heavenly things.

Shall we not desire, then? Desire is the motive force of life. But we will all learn to desire rightly, and thus bring to every man one day his true heart's desire. Light On The Path tells us to "kill out" - that is, "transmute" - ambition, desire for comfort, prestige, feeling of superiority, hunger for sensation, hunger for growth; that is, to feel we are someone or getting somewhere. Then it tells us what to desire: God within us, God beyond us, power, peace, possessions. "But," it goes on to qualify, "those possessions must belong to the pure soul only (i.e.; the united spirit of life) and be possessed by all pure souls equally Hunger for such possessions as can be held by the pure soul, that you may accumulate wealth for that united spirit of life which is your only true self." "A sacred peace which nothing can disturb" is a prerequisite for the soul's true growth, and the power we shall covet "is that which makes the disciple appear as nothing in the eyes of men."

I have often quoted the words of the Master K.H. To Mr. Judge: "You must live for other men and with them, not for or with yourself." This is purity. And this purity wins the Divine vision. "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God." How do we see God? Not with fleshly eyes, or even with the mind or the emotions. Perhaps true, unselfish emotion comes near, for there is a secret stairway, a short road, to the Divine, described to us by Dr. Besant. It is by way of the atomic levels in each of our principles.

In the mind body H.P.B. Called it the Antahkarana, the "Bridge." She described it as "Manas purified of all egotism" - the mind, still and pure of all wave lengths of personal desire or scheming, so that as in a mirror lake it reflects the glory beyond. Having become "single," it shines with radiant light.

In the emotional body the same level is reached by pure, unselfish emotions, love shining forth not for what it can attract or even for what it can give but because like light, it must shine, that being its very nature. Dr. Besant once put this in an unforgettable little mantram:

"There is only one Thinker; let Him think through me. There is only one Lover; let Him love through me. There is only one Actor; let Him act through me.

Out of whole-heartedness and single-mindedness grows that quality of the older soul, simplicity. All great souls are simple, unsophisticated. The simplicity of the child is not the simplicity of the sage. One is potential; the other is actual, the fruit of experience and the simplification of desires and concepts. It is in the midway stages we become complicated and sophisticated.

The single eye and the whole heart become tremendous channels for the Divine Will, for spiritual strength. "His strength was as the strength of ten because his heart was pure," was said of Sir Galahad in the tales of King Arthur and his Knights.

Well may we desire that purity which sets us free from the burden of ourselves, as pilgrim Christian's burden rolled from his shoulders at the foot of Christ's cross in John Bunyan's immortal allegory. The Saviours of men knew that so well, and so the Christ cried: "Come unto Me alone for shelter. Sorrow not, I will liberate thee from all sins."

CHAPTER -XVI-

FAILURE

Dr. Besant often quoted the saying: "There is no failure except in ceasing to strive." And she used to tell us that what a person longed for and idealized mattered far more than what he was. On the walls of the lovely Theosophical Hall in Auckland, New Zealand, are printed in gold her words: "No soul that aspires can ever fail to reach; no heart that loves can ever be abandoned." I wonder if we might interpret the words of the Christ when he told us that we should forgive those who injured us until seventy times seven as also the injunction to forgive ourselves, too? Despair is listed in Roman Catholic teaching as a deadly sin. The Voice Of The Silence says: "Beware of fear that spreadeth, like the black and soundless wings of midnight bat, between the moonlight of the Soul and the great goal that loometh in the distance far away. Fear, O disciple, kills the will and stays all action." As Frederick Myers wrote: "God shall forgive thee all but thy despair."

Let us examine despair and self-depreciation a little. What lies at their roots? Extreme remorse, and also undue anxiety, are rooted in excessive self-interest. We will make mistakes again and again, that is certain, for we are not yet perfect in knowledge and experience. But our mistakes are our teachers. If we had not made them we would be that much short of wisdom.

A Master once told Mr. Judge that tears and remorse belong to the personal self and should not hinder the progress of the Immortal Self. "Do not be led into anxiety and remorse," He wrote: "have patience. Endurance is one of the characteristics of the Ego. The Ego persists, knowing itself immortal. The personality becomes discouraged, knowing that time is short." The Voice of The Silence states: "Have patience, candidate, as one who doth forevermore endure." I think it was the Master K.H. Who once said: "The only repentance which is worth while is the resolve not to do it again." But supposing we find ourselves still doing it again, and finally suffer contempt for the weak thing which is ourselves? What then? There is no way but to try once more. And perhaps it is best not to rely too much upon our own strength alone. Call upon the Divine Power. Rest in Him. Sweet and sane old Brother Lawrence told God that he could not do anything of himself. "Thou must help me, or I shall fail again and again."

Now I do not think that just to become more nearly perfect or a better character is an inspiring motive. But if we remember that in winning the battle we are saving humanity a little sorrow and pain, we then have the finest and most inspiring motive in the world. We will conquer ourselves that we may not betray others and that we may not betray the Master who deigns to ask our aid with men. Then we shall never despair. H.P.B. Has some very wise words on this thought in one of her articles. She says that over-anxiety and a too-excessive desire to grow produce in us excrescences which must be removed by pain. True growth is like that of a child, all over, imperceptibly. Tennyson wrote that "men may rise on stepping stones of their dead selves to higher things." But in order to use a dead past as a stepping stone, we must let it be really dead! Looking ahead, what do we see? The Ideal, the Christ within, beckoning to us ever. Meanwhile, let us be patient with ourselves.

CHAPTER -XVII-

TRUST AND SELF-SURRENDER

I have lately been studying a little book by Father de Caussade on "Abandonment." He says in it some very lovely and true things. For long now I have felt that the Great Teacher of us all is Life, and Life never means us ill; only, and at every moment, under every conceivable circumstance, our eternal good. For what is life and that never-ceasing succession of events which we call Karma? There is only one Life, one Consciousness in all the universe, and the succession of events which constitute our daily lives is that Divine Life or Will in action.

What is the Will of God? It is the purpose or direction of the universe. I remember Dr. Besant's telling us that on the Nirvanic plane it looks like a resistless, flowing tide of light. Nothing can resist it, for there is no other Will but His. And it means, in the end, as Emerson told us, absolute fulfillment and bliss for every living thing. For Ananda, Bliss, is the greatest attribute of that Life. That is why we want to be happy, which means to find our true selves. That cannot be done all at once, so, during our lives of probation here on earth, let us realize that enduring happiness is not to be found here and, as H.P.B. Puts it, "wait with patience the hour of our true, our real birth."

That Will expresses itself in the great Laws of Nature, "with whom is no variableness or shadow of turning," for the Laws of Nature are the imprint of the Divine Mind upon matter. They are the true commandments of God. They act with magnificent impersonality and are the same, yesterday, today and forever. The Law is not only just but merciful. The Latin Mercedes, from which we derive the word "mercy" means "recompense." To Thee, O Lord, belongeth mercy and justice, for Thou renderest to every man according to his works." And the Prophet Jeremiah wrote: "Thine own wickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove thee."

It is all summed up so beautifully in an ancient saying from an Upanishad: "The universe exists for the sake of the Self." We so often think to find God and His Purpose in some far away heaven or in some high state of meditation, whereas the truth is that He is as much here in this world as on the Nirvanic plane. "Nearer is He than breathing, closer than hands and feet." I heard Dr. Besant preach a sermon on the Love of God. She said the Love of God was all around us like electricity in the air and that it only needed that we open our hearts to it. "Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear My voice'

Now where do we hear that Voice and touch that Life? The Divine Voice spoke of old to men through great teachers and prophets. But all the time He is speaking to you and to me. He speaks to mankind in general events, but to each one of us through the little events of daily life. For have we ever realized that life, Karma, is God in Action/ "Lord , what wouldst Thou have me to do?" The answer is that he asked of us nothing more than the duty of the moment. In fulfilling that as perfectly as we know how, we are doing His will, just as He would have us do. Exteriorly, nothing more is happening to us than happens to the rest of mankind; but interiorly, the eye of faith discovers and develops nothing less than God working great things. If we truly and wholly give our hearts to the Master and to God through Him, what He asks of us will be indicated by the events of daily life.

Father de Caussade says that "Sanctity consists in but one thing - fidelity to the order of God. The active part consist in fulfilling the duties imposed upon us; the passive part in lovingly accepting all that God sends us each moment." He calls these little daily events "the shadows which veil the Divine Action," says that it is all the more visible to the eye of faith when hidden under appearances most repugnant to the senses. The Divine Love, says he, is communicated to us through the veil of creatures and sometimes most so through those who are seemingly unjust and unkind. Is not one of the steps on the Way "a courageous endurance of personal injustice?" Dr. Besant told us that we should be grateful to unpleasant people who step on our toes and jar our sensibilities for they are often our greatest teachers.

At all times, under all circumstances, Life is shaping us for divine and immortal ends; shaping us through the changing, fleeting events of Life. It is more difficult to see this in disappointment, sorrow and loss, but often these bring us the most wonderful illumination of all experiences. Krishnaji said that most of us flee from sorrow, but that if we opened our arms to it we would grow and learn so wonderfully.

Most of us have hidden fears, sometimes subconscious ones. Try to relax, not to fear . "Rest in the Lord Who is Life itself," the Master K.H. Wrote to Mr. Judge. He told him to desire nothing for his separated self, no results which give that sense of power, but only to try all the time to reach nearer to the Center of Life, the Divinity we all share. "Draw on the breath of the great throbbing in us all," wrote He, "and let faith carry you through your life as a bird flies in the air - undoubtingly.

Never mind what the events of life are, they are for the best. Never mind what other people are. There is no sin, only lack of growth. Never mind what we are but be willing to be what we are. We do not really know ourselves. God and the Master know us better. Leave all to Him and grow as a flower grows, through ceaseless aspiration and love of beauty and truth.

In peace shall we grow. "Attaineth peace into whom all desires flow as rivers into the ocean, not he who desireth desires. And Peace is the fruit of self-surrender."